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A Stinky Pussy 9/5/2007
One December day we found an old straggly cat at our door.
She was a sorry sight. She was starving, dirty, smelled terrible,
skinny, and hair all matted down.
We felt sorry for her so we put her in a carrier and took her
to the vet. We didn't know what to call her so we named her "Pussycat."
The vet decided to keep her for a day or so. He said he would
let us know when we ...
1 Comments, 121 Views,
6 Votes
,5.64 Score
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A Quicky! 9/4/2007
What do you get if you cross an insomniac, an agnostic, and
a dyslexic?
Someone who stays awake at night wondering if there really
is a dog.
2 Comments, 76 Views,
3 Votes
,4.41 Score
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Used Rubbers! 8/26/2007
Do you know how to reuse a rubber?? A. You turn it inside out and shake the fuck out of it!
What do you call a with a runny nose? A. Full!
0 Comments, 104 Views,
5 Votes
,4.12 Score
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I don't care who you are, this is funny! 8/22/2007
Nymphomaniacs Convention
A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled
in, he glanced up to see the most beautiful woman he had ever
seen boarding the plane and was headed right toward him.
As luck would have it, she sat in the seat next to him. Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out, "business
trip or pleasure?" She smiled at him and replied, "business, ...
0 Comments, 183 Views,
10 Votes
,6.37 Score
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Two old Ladies 8/2/2007
There was two old ladies doing charity work at a nursing
home. They stepped out back to smoke a cigarette. After
they took a few a few puffs, it started to rain. One lady put
out her cigarette and started to walk in when she saw her
friend pull out a condom from her pocket and then cut the
end off with the sizzors from her other pocket. She then
slid the condom over her cigarette, exposing the ...
1 Comments, 232 Views,
7 Votes
,4.82 Score
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Golf Again 7/29/2007
Two old men were playing a round of golf one day and when they
got to the 18th hole, they noticed a hearse and funeral procession
going by on the main road along side the 18th hole. Sam removed
his hat and placed it over his heart and bowed his head as
his friend looked on. When the funeral procession was past,
Sam put on his hat and started to line up his next shot. His
friend said, "Sam, that ...
0 Comments, 112 Views,
4 Votes
,5.57 Score
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More Golf 7/29/2007
Three generations of men, the , the father of the
and the father of the father decided to play a round of golf.
They were at the first tee ready to tee off whan a lovely young
woman came up to them and asked if she could join them. It
seemed her partner, a doctor, had a last minute emergency
and had to leave her alone. They all looked at each other
and said sure, ladies first! The lady got her ...
0 Comments, 131 Views,
2 Votes
,5.20 Score
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Two Lovely Lesbians 7/28/2007
These two lovely lesbians were sitting side by side at the
bar. Neither one knew the other, but they both knew why they
were there. Neither one wanted to make the first move. Finally
one turns to the other and says, "let me be frank...."
and the other jumps back, "No, let me be Frank!"
0 Comments, 104 Views,
3 Votes
,3.43 Score
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Speeding ticket 7/28/2007
A cop pulls a guy over for speeding and walks up to the driver
and says, "let me see your license." The driver relies, "I'm sorry officer, I can't
do that." "why not?" "I lost my license a few years ago because of a DUI that
resulted in a death." "Let me see your registration". "I can't do that either." "Why not?" "This isn't my car, I stole it." "Then open the glove box and let me see who it ...
0 Comments, 174 Views,
3 Votes
,4.41 Score
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2 Blonde Jokes 5/19/2007
JOKE 1
Two friends chatting in a cafe.
The brunette says to the blonde, "You are what you eat you know"
The blonde looks up angrily and says, "Are you calling me a cunt!?" JOKE 2
Why did the blonde have bruises round her belly button?
Cause blonde guys arent that smart either =)
0 Comments, 273 Views,
7 Votes
,4.31 Score
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Preacher Man on his deathbed 5/7/2007
An old preacher man is dieing. he sends a message to his Lawyer and and agent of the Inland
Revenue to come to his house immediatly, for time was short.
As they entered the room, the preacher beckoned them both
to sit on each side of the bed. For a long while nobody said anything. They were both honoured that the man had asked them to be
by his side, but were puzzled because the preacher had ...
0 Comments, 821 Views,
50 Votes
,5.44 Score
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Margaret and Charles 2/18/2007
An elderly couple, Charles and Margaret, are in California.
Charles always wanted some authentic cowboy boots, seeing
some on sale one day, he buys them. Wears them back to the
house, walking proudly. He walks into the house and says
to his wife
(Charles) "Notice anything different?"
(Margaret) "Nope"
Frustrated Charles storms off into the bathroom, undresses,
and walks back ...
10 Comments, 3047 Views,
83 Votes
,4.18 Score
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A Famous Mouse 2/18/2007
A well-known cartoon mouse go to head studios to meet with
the Manager, the Producer and a Consultant Psychologist.
The mouse walks into the room and takes a seat.
(Manager) "We have called you here to discuss the results of
your accusations towards your fellow Co-hostess"
(The Prouduce) "Micky, the Doctor here has done a full examination
of Minnie and found nothing to back up what ...
0 Comments, 173 Views,
16 Votes
,5.04 Score
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He saved her life :-S 1/30/2007
There's these two country type blokes (Men) sitting
down to lunch at this fancy cafe, any way a lady near them
start's to choke on her food, all these people are running
around in a mad panic trying to work out what to do. So without
any fuss one of the country blokes walks over to this lady
, pulles down her pants and lickes the full crack of her arse!
she gets such a shock she spits out ...
1 Comments, 209 Views,
10 Votes
,2.79 Score
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pants 11/30/2006
why are small pants like small hotels.
No ballroom.
0 Comments, 205 Views,
9 Votes
,1.29 Score
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Asshole strecher 9/21/2006
A women was late for work and was driving somewhat over the
speed limit. Sure enough, just as she crossed a bridge she
saw a cop hiding there with his radar gun out. The cop pulled
her over and asked where she was going in such a hurry. She
said she was late for work. The cop said what do you do? She
said I am an asshole streacher. He asked How do you do that?
She said I start with ...
2 Comments, 456 Views,
22 Votes
,6.25 Score
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Breast enlargement. 8/22/2006
A small breasted woman says to her husband "I've
seen an advert for breast enlargement, the surgery's
only charging $2000 dollars"
The husband says "Don't be rediculous, we can't
afford that. Why don't you just stuff some toilet tissue
down there"?
She says "That won't make much difference will
it"?
He says "Oh I dunno, it worked on your ass"!
3 Comments, 355 Views,
9 Votes
,1.93 Score
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WHY IS A CUCUMBER BETTER THAN A MAN? 7/28/2006
This was sent to me by E-mail from a friend I have no idea who
wrote it or when... Enjoy
WHY IS A CUCUMBER BETTER THAN A MAN?
You can enjoy a cucumber all night long.
Cucumber stains wash out.
You don't have to drink wine and dine with a cucumber
before getting to the fun stuff.
Your cucumber will always wait patiently for you in the
car while you go shopping.
...
0 Comments, 293 Views,
20 Votes
,3.76 Score
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if it hurt 4/2/2006
if it hurts its ok , it hurt me tooo , but then i knew the warm
rod would wide my wall an it would all feel so good an it did
, i felt it for days an wanted more
3 Comments, 445 Views,
20 Votes
,2.49 Score
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why'd he post that? 3/9/2006
So he could get the free points I think
1 Comments, 248 Views,
9 Votes
,2.36 Score
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Italian learning English 2/27/2006
A bus stops, and 2 Italian men get on. They sit down and engage
in an animated conversation. The lady sitting next to them
ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized
when she hears one of them say the following:
<br>
<br>
<br>
"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together.
I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again.
I come again ...
6 Comments, 1991 Views,
101 Votes
,5.74 Score
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WHAT'S IN A NAME? 2/17/2006
I WAS ON THE PHONE WITH A GUY NAMED PAUL, AND I COULDN'T
FIGURE WHICH GUY HE WAS, SO AFTER SEVERAL MINUTES OF CURIOSITY,
I FINALLY ASKED HIM TO TELL ME HIS HANDLE.
HE ANSWERED: "HANDLE'S MESSIAH".
1 Comments, 416 Views,
15 Votes
,0.68 Score
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HARD WORK 2/16/2006
I HAD BEEN PROPOSITIONING JIMBO FOR YEARS, AND ALL HE EVER
DID WAS TEASE ME AND JOKE ABOUT IT. ONE DAY HIS ORIGINALITY
REALLY GOT RIGHT TO THE POINT. HE SAID, "I'LL
FUCK YOUR SUCKER, IF YOU'LL SUCK MY FUCKER."
0 Comments, 310 Views,
10 Votes
,1.59 Score
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DELI HUMOR 2/16/2006
MY FRIEND JIM HAS ALWAYS BEEN QUICK WITH A BON MOT. ONE NIGHT
IN A DELI, ALSO A GAY BAR, THERE WERE SOME STRAIGHT GUYS WHO
WERE OBVIOUSLY TRYING TO ATTRACT OUR ATTENTION.
ONE OF THOSE GUYS SPREAD HIS LEGS WIDE AND GRABBED HIS CROTCH,
UPON WHICH JIM SAID, "NOW THAT'S AN ENGRAVED
INVITATION!"
0 Comments, 277 Views,
9 Votes
,2.57 Score
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CLOWNING AROUND 2/16/2006
ONE NIGHT SEVERAL OF US GAY FRIENDS DECIDED VERY LATE TO
GO TO A STRAIGHT BAR ACROSS THE STREET FROM N.S.STATE UNIVERSITY.
WE WERE IN OUR PAJAMAS AND OVERCOATS, AND OUR "SLUTTY"
FRIEND LISA WAS WITH US. INSIDE THE BAR THERE WERE COMMENTS
AND CAT CALLS, AND WE WALKED OUT TO AVOID CONFRONTATION.
OUTSIDE WERE SEVERAL GUYS DRINKING BEER. ONE OF THEM SAID,
"WHAT IS THIS--THE CIRCUS?". LISA ...
0 Comments, 258 Views,
7 Votes
,4.31 Score
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IS HE GAY? 2/16/2006
I HAVE MESSED WITH STRAIGHT GUYS FOR MOST OF MY LIFE, AND
MANY OF THEM HAVE BROUGHT FRIENDS FOR ME TO ENJOY. ONE NIGHT
TIM BROUGHT JERRY WITH HIM. AFTER WATCHING FOR AWHILE,
JERRY ASKED, "IS HE GAY?". TIM SAID, "NO,
HE'S NOT GAY. IT'S JUST THAT HE FOUND OUT HE LIKES
TO SUCK DICKS."
0 Comments, 361 Views,
15 Votes
,5.73 Score
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GAY 2/16/2006
I HAD JUST GIVEN CHAZ HIS Nth BLOW JOB. AS I LOOKED UP FROM
HIS CROTCH, HE HAD A STRANGE LOOK ON HIS FACE. HE GRABBED
ME UNDER THE ARMS, PULLED ME UP TO HIS FACE, AND SAID ,
"DON'T EVER ACT GAY, AND DON'T EVER BE GAY."
SAY WHAT?
0 Comments, 291 Views,
9 Votes
,3.64 Score
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Potato 2/12/2006
POTATO PROSTITUTES
<br>
Two little potatoes are standing on the street corner.
One is a .
<br>
How can you tell which one is the ?
<br>
The one with the label:
<br>
I DA HO.
0 Comments, 284 Views,
12 Votes
,4.04 Score
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Charlie Makes Me Laugh 2/10/2006
Howdy Cowboy’s:
<br>
<br>
I have been wondering lately why my life seams to of taken
on this unambiguous nature, and how things are working
out so much better these days, and after much deliberation
I have concluded that I owe all this to my boyfriend Charlie.
I met Charlie on Out Personals last year and we began chatting
and instant messaging, right at first we realized ...
0 Comments, 187 Views,
5 Votes
,4.12 Score
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Maybe You'll Laugh, Maybe You Won't 1/31/2006
Howdy Cowboy’s:
<br>
From the suppressed memory bank’s of Uncle Buck, comes
another sensational contribution to the world of blog’s,
I was talking to my B/F Charlie and we were discussing some
of my adolescent experiences, when I started telling him
about something I used to do as a , you may or may
not find humor in my non- fictional tale, but I had allot
of fun changing ...
0 Comments, 279 Views,
8 Votes
,4.64 Score
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